I have been tracking my pain levels and my medications. I am prescribed three muscle relaxers and Ativan a day, but normally only take one. With my pain levels being so high I had decided to try to take them three times a day and see if I could obtain more relief.
I took my normal morning medications with my usual first dose of pain medications. My pain level was a 9 and after an hour it was still a 9! So I took one muscle relaxer and an Ativan and waited another hour. My pain level was then an 8! Still too much. I took my 2nd dose of pain medications and waited an hour to see what my pain level was then, I was at a 7! I made it about two hours at a level 7 for pain, which then shot up to a 9 again, so then I took another round of muscle relaxer and Ativan. After an hour my pain level was at a 8. So this time I waited to take my 3rd dose of pain medications with a muscle relaxer and the Ativan, my pain level was back to a full 9 and after taking that and waiting an hour to record my pain level I was able to get it down to a 6/7. I still felt all the pain, but my mind just didn’t care as much. Then I discovered that I was having problems with my vision and unable to really focus of see straight and nausea hit, this lasted for a couple of hours.
In order to obtain any relief from the intense pain I need to take everything together, but then I am left with a loopy feeling, vision issues and nausea. So I either cry in pain in bed or I take the meds I am prescribe and feel loopy and sick. WTF! I really do not know what else to do here!
I have so much stress and anxiety on top of the pain. No support system and being with someone who only cares about himself and his wants without ever considering mine. Married three times and not once could I get it right. How awesome it must be to be with someone that loved and cared for you so much that they were willing to do anything possible to try to help you. Instead of only caring about the toys they want and wasting money on things not even needed while you suffer every minute of every day.
I am going to find a way to make it through this next month. To all my appointments and tests and then to schedule surgery in June, then I will recover and on my birthday in August I will take a look at everything in my life and make the changes I need in order to survive in a happier place. I must put myself first and stop doing for everyone else. What comes around goes around………….