I wish it was that easy. Just snap your fingers and all the problems go away. All the pain stops and life is beautiful again. Our minds are very powerful. I know if I could just get above the darkness, I would be able to think positive thoughts and go forward with a better presence of mind. One thing I know for certain, is that all thing in life would be much easier if you have a support system. I daydream of a support system often. How nice it would be, instead of all the negativity and hatred I live around. To have someone that was positive and supportive, I can see how much that would help. It is so very difficult for someone in constant pain to think positive thoughts. Having that one supportive person there, just saying positive things, that would be so nice.
Here is my daydream: I wake in the usual crushing pain, but my support person is right there for me. Telling me how it will be ok because they are here for me. Asking me if I need anything and saying beautiful positive things as they open the curtains and let the sun shine in.
Knowing someone really cares and that they are there for you no matter what, definitely makes life a bit more sunny! Being able to have someone around that says positive things and smiles, also helps lift your mood. I am smiling just thinking about it.
Here is my reality: I wake in the usual pain, I hobble to the bathroom to take my medications. I sit alone and try so very hard to occupy my mind away from the crushing pain, until hopefully, the medications take the edge off of it. Someone comes in and says, “Can you watch your Grandson? I have to get ready to do a job!” All negative and draining. Where I respond, “I am sorry, but I have not been able to walk yet.” Then they storm off and slam the door. Then I sit for another hour and another dose of medication until I finally get the crushing edge eased up so I can actually walk. So much negativity here! Absolutely NO support what so ever! The only positive I ever get is when I receive an email from my mother. I HAVE to do a load of laundry today. When ever I can finally emerge from my cave, that is.
I know I have talked about a support system before. I know how important that is for anyone suffering in pain or any illness. In a beautiful world, we would all have at least one positive supportive person in our lives. So, I try to be my own support system, but there are days, or weeks, where I can’t seem to break through the darkness and find the positive and supportive light. This last week has been a very difficult one for me. Feeling alone even though you are in a room full of people. Pain dragging you deep into the darkness. Have you ever tried the experiment where you smile at someone who looks down? I have and a smile really does help bring another person up. That one simple act of positive light by smiling. If I had one wish, I would wish for the entire world to be positive. Because when you are surround by positive, life is less stressful and more beautiful. All things seem easier when you are in a positive frame of mind. Have you noticed how you can be in a great mood and feel happy, then someone comes into the room and that one person is negative and dark, then all of a sudden you feel negative too. The statement is true, surround yourself with positive people and life will be beautiful. Surround yourself with negative people and your light will dim out. How crazy is it that one single person can effect the state of mind of a room full of people! Yet it is very true. Sometimes we do not have a choice in who we are around. Whether it is a family member or a co worker. How do we protect ourselves from being dragged down by the one person in our life that seems to suck the life out of us? When I focus on positive and keep repeating positive statements I find life to be much easier. So, today, every time I have heard this person approaching, I have repeated “I feel so happy and full of beautiful life, my light is brighter than any darkness that I may encounter” the first couple of times this person came storming in with their negativity, they did not seem to respond to my beaming smile, but the last time I encounter them, I felt a softening around them and they did not say one negative thing to me. Hmmmm…… I think I am on to something here! Yes, it takes energy and focus to keep our thoughts protected from the negative people we encounter. But I feel so much better right now, than I did when I started writing this post. I know I would much rather feel full of light than full of darkness. The hardest thing for me is getting myself in a positive frame of mind while I am consumed in so much pain. What I did today, that seemed to work well, was as soon as I got up and took my medications, I focused on positive things like: I am lucky to have the comfort of a warm home on such a cold day… I am so grateful for my bed and the comfort it gives me while I sleep… I am filled with Joy and Happiness…
We don’t automatically think these things when we are in so much pain or consumed with negativity, so I had to write down things I was grateful for and make myself read them over and over for a few minutes. What I found was, I felt lighter and noticed less intense pain. A smile was upon my face by the time I was done and I really feel so much better mentally. I have repeatedly asked, “How do we get to a positive mind when we are so consumed in horrible pain?” I came up with this idea and tried it out today. Now I have a reminder for every morning to read my list and really put forth the effort of focusing on the positive things in life, as well as, writing down things I am grateful for daily. You will need to make a list when you feel good or at the very least feel less negative. Every time you ask yourself what you are grateful for, write it down. That way you will have positive things to read and remind yourself while you are in a dark mood or place. This is the prime time to do it, since we are in the month of Thanksgiving and many people do focus on what they are grateful for now. I wasn’t sure this would work and I am pleasantly surprised that it did. The key is to keep finding the positive and reminding yourself of those things. Most importantly, while we feel so negative in depression or pain and When someone we know, is a negative person, approaches us!
I hope, that with continued practice, the positive thoughts will become more natural and effortless. It is so very easy to feel and thing negative things when we are in so much pain. I just want to be able to say, “Hey! I can change the energy around me just by thinking positive thought!” I guess I can say that, but I am hoping it will be easier for me to do in the times of extreme crippling pain. It takes 21 days to form a habit, so three weeks of every day repeating all I am grateful for, should form a habit that is much easier to retrieve. Wish me luck, would you? Let me know if you decide to try this for 21 days as well!