Natural Cleaning…

I wanted to share what I do and use when cleaning.  I go the natural and very inexpensive route…

MICROWAVE:  Place 1 cup of water in a 2 cup glass measuring cup.  Add 1 Tablespoon of Lemon Juice.  Place in microwave and cook for 3 minutes, then let it sit for a few minutes.  This steams the inside and makes it very easy to wipe all the cooked on gunk right out!

SINK:  I sanitize my sink every week.  I rinse the entire sink and faucet with hot water, then I sprinkle baking soda all over.  I put extra baking soda in and around the drain.  I use a spray bottle with either white vinegar or apple cider vinegar and spray all over.  This creates a foaming action.  I then drizzle some soap around and use a brush to scrub everywhere.  Make sure to get in the nooks and crannies of the faucet and drain areas.  I then pour vinegar down the drain, this cleans and deodorizes very well and it also helps keep your drain lines open.  Next I rinse thoroughly with hot water.  You will need to rinse your rag out several times or use the sprayer on very low to help rinse everywhere.  Then I dry the sink with a towel.  I take a rage and rub a little olive oil all over, followed by a dry rage to buff.  This help keep the sink clean much longer!

COUNTER & STOVE:  I use essential oils for this cleaning.  I make my own Thieves Oil Blend.  Recipe: 2 tsp. Clove E.O., 1 1/2 tsp. Lemon E.O., 1 tsp. Cinnamon Bark E.O., 3/4 tsp. Eucalyptus E.O., 1/2 tsp. Rosemary E.O.  Place all ingredients into a dark color glass bottle.  (I use a funnel for this).  Label the bottle, Thieves Oil, then use 20 drops in a 16 oz. spray bottle and fill with water to make your all purpose antibacterial cleaner.  Using this cleaner makes it very easy to wipe off cooked-on food on the stove and other areas.  Just spray, wait a few seconds and wipe.  

GLASS & MIRRORS:  I make my own glass cleaner as well.  16 oz. spray bottle. Mix 1 1/2 cups Hot Water and 1 Tablespoon of Cornstarch mix very well.  Add 1/4 cup Rubbing Alcohol, 1/4 cup White Vinegar. Mix well, then add to your spray bottle.  Be sure to shake well before every use.  You can also add 5 drops of Peppermint Essential Oil if you like.

BATHROOM CLEANER SPRAY:  This works very well.  16 oz. Glass Bottle.  Add 2 cups Hot Water to Bottle and 1 Tablespoon Borax.  Shake to mix thoroughly.  Add 1 Tablespoon of Dawn (or any other soap you prefer). Add 20 drops of Orange E.O., 20 drops of Tea Tree E.O. And 10 drops of Lavender E.O. Shake well before every use.

LAUNDRY DETERGENT: I have made this for many years and it works better than any store bought ones.  It is also very cheap to make.  All items can be found at Walmart.    1 Box of Borax, 1 Box of Super Washing Doda, 4 pounds of Baking Soda, 1 small container of Oxyclean, 2 Bars of Fels-Naptha or Zote Laundry Soap – Grated.  You can also buy the laundry soap flakes instead.  For scent – I add a bottle of Downy Crystals (optional). Mix all very well and use 2 Tablesppons for each load, up to 1/4 cup for heavy soiled loads.  Safe for HE washers too.

FABRIC SOFTENER:  I am allergic to fabric softener so I use white vinegar.  I fill the fabric softener section full with white vinegar and it works wonderful.  You do not smell it at all once the clothes are dry. BONUS: using vinegar in place of fabric softener fluffs towels and helps them stay absorbant. 

DISHWASHER DETERGENT:  Mix the following… 2 cups Borax, 2 cups Super Washing Soda, 6 Tablespoons Citric acid -or- 2 packets of Lemon Kool aid and 25 drops of Grapefruit or Lemon E.O.  Use the same as store bought to fill soap department.  Fill the rinse agent compartment with white vinegar.  The vinegar is important, it makes sure you do not have spots on your glasses.

DUSTING SPRAY:  I used an old Pledge Muilt-surface 16 oz. bottle, but you can use any spray bottle.  This is for wood.  Combine 1 Tablespoon Olive Oil, 1/4 cup white vinegar, 15-30 drops of Lemon E.O.  Fill up bottle with water. Shake before every use.  This really cleans well and keeps the wood conditioned.

Borax is an awesome cleaner.  I mix some with white vinegar and hot water to clean the baseboards, etc.  It cleans well and deodorizes.  I also use this to spot clean stains on the carpet.  So far, it has gotten up all stains on my carpets!

To keep you appliances running well and drain lines open, run a cup of white vinegar in an empty dishwasher every month.  Run 1 cup of white vinegar and 1/2 cup Baking Soda in an empty washing machine every month.  To clean the coffee maker run 1/2 the pot of water and 1/2 of white vinegar through the machine, then follow that with 2 pots of just water to rinse out.  For a Keurig, do 1/2 water and 1/2 white vinegar in the reservoir.  Run through a cup without anything else in the machine.  Start to run another cup through and when the fluid begins to come out into your cup, open the lid (where you would place a K-cup) and let it sit for an hour.  Then close the lid for it to finish making the cup.  Run one more cup through the machine, then dump the reservoir, clean it and fill with clean water. End by running 3 cups of the plain water through the machine.  I do this every month to keep the machine clean and running well.   

Revlon Review…

I was lucky enough to try the Revlon ColorStay- Angeled 2 in 1 eyeliner, brow pencil & crayon, Creme shadow and mascara…

All of these products stay on ALL day long!  Just Amazing to me.

The Kajal Angeled 2 in 1 Eyeliner is by far the best eyeliner I have ever used to date.  Never before have I been able to apply my eyeliner in one easy swipe.  It also has an Angeled brush on the other end for blending.  This eyeliner does not cry off either!  This is my absolute favorite of all…

The Brow Pencil is also Angeled, which makes applying in just the right spot very easy.  It has a brush on the other end, which allows you to get the look of brow hairs easily.  The Brow Crayon goes on in one easy stroke as well.  I had never used anything before to define my brows, but now I will continue to use these for beautiful definition.

The Super Length Mascara brought out my eye lashes like no other and it stays on all day.  This mascara did not irritate my eyes, like others, so I was able to keep it on all day long.

The Creme Eye Shadow has a brush inside the cap and application is a breeze.  I applied this to the inner corner of my eye in to the center and again just under my center brows.  This really opened up my eyes.

If you get a chance to try Revlon ColorStay, do it!  You will NOT regret it…

Major Venting….

I must have a sign on me that says… “If your a liar, talk to me”. I didn’t want a relationship or any man.  He came out of no where and wooed me, like no other.  He made promises I never once even asked for.  Then I find out he is a chronic liar and has done this before to another.  I deal with enough crap in my own life, why the heck did he have to pick me…

Of course, I do not want to be with anyone that is a liar, but it still hurts like hell.  I have never met a man that didn’t lie to me or that was even a man of his word.  I told him up front, right from the start, everything I deal with and how I wont be with a liar, cheater , etc.   I thought that would make sure I wasn’t hurt again.  I am so hurt and so angry that he did this to me.  What the hell?  

I am going to get fat so men just stay away from me period.  I am NEVER going to be in another relationship the rest of my suffering life!  It is hard enough to deal with the pain I live in every day, I can’t deal with this emotional hell on top of it.  It has been 5 days now, why can’t I get over it already?  To top it off, he won’t admit to the lies I have proof of.  Typical, if you don’t admit to it, it never happened.  I have been shit on by every single man in my entire life…  I struggle to survive every day.  From the pain, depression, no money, no vehicle and lack of any kind of healthy food available.  

My daughter got out of jail last week.  She is still doing good at staying away from the drugs.  I want to help her succeed, but my son won’t let me.  I am controlled in my own home.  I can’t pay the utilities and he said if I let my daughter stay here even one night they would leave.  Screw it, I am done with everything.  Leave then, I don’t care anymore…

The Present Moment…

They saying goes, that if we want to be happy and feel good, we need to remain inthe present moment.  Just this very moment, nothing else.  No Past or Future, no tomorrow or next hour, etc.  That is the secret in DBT, dialectical behavior therapy, which I did for 3 years straight.  The reason we don’t remember things, is because we do not pay attention to each present moment and what we are doing at that time.  It requires you to completely and only focus on right now…

Say you are sitting in a chair, you would describe to yourself exactly what you are doing right then.  “I am sitting in my chair, my legs are bent, I can hear birds chirping, I hear a car driving by, and so on!  The actual present moment.  The same applies to every thing we do. Washing dishes, focus on only that!  The problem is, I keep forgetting to be in the present moment…

We can only do the best we can.  I seem to have to constantly remind myself to just be in today, this hour, this minute.  Do not worry about anything else.  What will be, will be.  Go with the flow and flow with what may come.  It is a daily struggle for me.  Why does it have to be this difficult?  

For me, I have found my mental well being is effected by clutter and messiness.  So, every single day that my body allows me to, I do basic chores.  I feel like I can breathe better too.  I have to complete what I want done in a 2-3 hour window, after that my body won’t allow anything else to be done.  I have found I struggle every single day, in the evening, with depression.  When I have to sit with all the pillows and I try to focus on a TV show or movie.  If only my body would let me do more, to occupy my mind.  I feel down and ever so alone in the evening…

I do the best when I can keep my mind busy.  Living with Panic & Anxiety Disorders, I have become a hermit.  In order to keep my levels down, I avoid people and places when ever possible.  It took me years to figure out many of my triggers and years to stop paying attention to time.  Now I am stuck home even if I wanted to go somewhere, my vehicle died back in 2015, I have no way to fix it.  I also, am unable to eat healthy (which can help), since I have to eat an entire month and get what the household needs on $200!  Oh crap, this is what happens, the stress…forgetting the present moment…focusing on the chaos of my so called life…

It would be nice to have a friend just to even talk to once a week.  Someone to do something with even.  My so called boyfriend, that lives in WI, barely even talks to me anymore.  He lost his job and is dealing with depression, which I understand.  I don’t understand barely talking to me when he is the one that came after me, insisted we were the same and made promises he is not keeping.  Why do men do this crap?  Can anyone be a man of their word?  I am open and talk about everything, he insisted he was too, then why not talk to me about things?  So, he got my hopes up and then ripped the rug out from under me…………

…EXPECTATIONS…

I have trouble not having expectations of others and that always leaves me full of disappointment.  I was raised to act right, because that’s what was expected of me.  There for, I was raised to have expectations…

I have tried so hard to just let go of those expectations, but they are so deep inside of me, that they are automatic.  We can only depend on ourselves and thinking someone else will do what we would do, is great expectations of that person, which leaves us totally disappointed.  We only ever really have ourselves and we can only ever really rely on ourselves…

The Expectations of Others, Has No Place in Happiness!  Time and time again, I have fully believed what someone else has said to me or promised me, only to be greatly disappointed when they do not hold true to their promises.  Why is it so hard to NOT have Expectations? How can one really stop having expectations, when they were told their entire life to have them?  Act right, because the world expects you too!  Why couldn’t I have been raised and taught to only rely on myself?  That would of been a huge help in life…

We create our own reality, by the thoughts we have and the things we voice.  I firmly believe this to be true.  I repeat every day over and over again, “Peace, Love, Happiness and Joy”. When one is happy, everything else is easier to handle.  I have seen this to be true myself.  Even my chronic pain is easier to handle when I am Happy!  We think others will make us happy, when in reality, only WE can bring happiness into our lives…

Everything in life is a choice.  Yes, choices of others can effect us, but in our own lives we make choices constantly.  When to get out of bed, what to wear, when to eat, etc.  of course, things can happen that we did not choose, like a child dying or cancer.  There enlies the profound words of, “Everything Happens for a reason!”  This, I also believe, to be very true.  Sometimes we never know the reason and other times we do.  The reason could have been for another person or something greater than we can know in this life.  This is where your own spiritual beliefs come into play.  I believe we are our souls, not these bodies.  That we are just renting them for the experiences here and we go on after these bodies die.  So, what you believe can help you are hinder you…

We can only truly control ourselves!  No one else!  We can control if we choose to react in a positive way or a negative way to things.  We control our own choices.  We can NEVER control another, just ourselves.  We should not even try to control anyone else, this also leads to disappointment.  Because thinking you can control someone or change them, is an expectation!  All we can do is continue on in the very moment we are in and know that this is our own life.  Try your best to choose Happiness and always come from a place of Love…

I would really like to know your opinions of what I have written here.  Please feel free to comment them to me………….

Love & Mental Issues…

My man, Frankie, came to see me for a week at the beginning of this month.  It was amazing to have him here.  He is very laid back and calm, which is something I really need in my life.  He brought 2 guitars with him and played them in the evenings.  It was so nice to sit back and listen to him!  He also brought me a Walking Dead T-shirt.  I am Obsessed with The Walking Dead!  We are moving on with our plans for him to move down here. It will take him a couple of months to get his things in order up there, then he will move to be with me!  I can’t wait!  The fact he still wants to take full care of me, even after being with me in person and seeing the pain I deal with, just amazes me!  I have a lot of issues both physical and mental…

What I don’t understand is, why I have been flooded with the emotional crap again, now that I am with someone.  While I was completely alone I never felt any of it.  Now, being in a relationship, it is all flooding me again.  I don’t want the negative thoughts or feelings!  For some reason, they have all hit me like a truck!  The worry and fear of loosing him.   Feeling like I am suddenly not important.  There is NO Reason for me to think these things, why the hell am I?  It is all part of my mental issues.  Obviously, I need to deal with them and work on them, which is why they have come back up.  Luckily, I am the kind of person that says what is on my mind.  So, I ask him and I feel better when he answers me, but I also hate that I am having the thoughts to begin with.  Then, I fear; that he may decide; he doesn’t want to deal with all my issues after all.  What an endless cycle of crap!  He is awesome and inside I KNOW he will always be here for me, so I Must find a way to shut this stuff up…

Ahh, the joys of living with mental illness.  And then there is the chronic pain too.  Who signs up for that, willingly?  While he was here, when I would have the spells of intense pain, he would place his hands there and just hold me.  So amazing!  Now I miss that immensely.  Never in my life have I been with such a caring and loving man!  He is caring and loving to everyone and everything.  I know I deserve him, yet part of me has such fear…  I often feel like I am in a battle between two halves of me.  Like, one part would want to die while the other part wants to live.  One part knows I deserve this beautiful man in my life, the other part says I don’t.  Always a battle… Why can’t I just be happy that I finally have such an amazing man in my life?  … Mental Illness and a past of being crapped on repeatedly by everyone…that’s why!

Frankie must be my reward for living through all the hell and not ending my life!  Right? Funny thing is, both of us had completely given up on ever being with someone and completely given up on life in general.  We were both just surviving, one day at a time, waiting for the end!  I feel like I will die before he ever gets here.  Another thing that is most likely not true.  He has only been gone from visiting me for one week today now.  I wish there was a switch to just shut off that part of my mind, before it drives me mad…

I am attaching a recent pic of Frankie and one of me… Wish we would of taken one together!  FYI: I am 3 months older than him…lol! 

My Other Half……

I have spent the last 2 years, being single, I chose over a year ago to not even date or socialize at all with the opposite sex.  I just did me and found my own rhythm, though occasionally I would think how it would be nice to have a good man in my life, I was certain that would never happen and even wondered if there were any good men left in this world. I hadn’t really smiled or even laughed much in the last year.  Being just me and alone, there wasn’t anyone to cause laughter within me.  Except for when I got goofy and made myself laugh… 

Right at the new year, a guy I dated way back in high school, added me on Facebook.  I showed up as some one he might know and he was flooded with memories of us.  He messaged me and we were talking about high school and all we remembered.  Now, if I had not known him and remembered him, I would never have accepted his request, let alone talk to him.  We found out that we have EVERYTHING in common and we are both very loving, caring people with big hearts.  He also chose to just be alone and figured it was for the rest of his life.  As each day passed, we found out more and more of how much we were the same!  Now, we talk every single morning as soon as he gets home from work, which is third shift.  We both are excited for our time together and look forward to it.  

I never thought it was possible to have or even find a Soul Mate, but he sure has changed my mind on that!  He lives all the way up in Wisconsin and I am in Georgia.  He said he wanted to come see me, but that it would be very hard to get time off of work, that they always denied his requests.  Well, he put in for a week off and he got it!  He will be here in the beginning of March!!!  If things go as well as we think they will, he is going to move down here to be with me!  He literally wants to take full care of me, in EVERY way!  With all my issues and problems!  We both feel like we finally found our other half that had been missing our entire lives!  Wow…. Unbelievable!  I feel so very blessed and I am so grateful that I did not end my life all those times I wanted too…

I have always believed everything happens for a reason.  How amazing to have something wonderful happen to me instead of horrible.  Life changes in a blink of an eye, as we all know too well.  NEVER EVER GIVE UP!  Good things do come to those who wait!  Also, all those people were right… All the times I was told how I needed to stay single and spend at least a year with just myself and come to a place where I was fine with being just me.  When you stop thinking about things, or worrying about them, they are able to blossom!  Just like when someone gets pregnant after difficulty, they stop even thinking about it, then it happens for them…